When Grandpa Means Business ( Laughing for Abs)

So this really did happen, and when it came back to memory from wherever it went on vacation to , I nearly ripped my throat from laughing.

So my sister and I, still little kids, thought we could have “a party ” while my grandpa was gonna  be gone shopping at the mall, “until 3 PM sharp,” he said. So once he leaves we run to the bathroom and stand on the edge of his bathtub to make sure his truck drives away. Once he is out of sight,  we blast Disney music and jump from sofa to sofa, screaming and thinking we had the best dance moves in America.  It was the time of our life, until we smack the finger off of one of his china dolls from Europe and it goes flying somewhere into the living room nowhere to be found. Then it is 3PM sharp and KAPOWW! The front smacks open, ” I home Cynty!!” My sister and I just  sit there pretending to watch “Rugrats,” smiling and quickly turning on the TV after 5 minutes of staring at a blank screen, incorrectly playing it cool.

3:30, and my grandma gets home from work, we go sit with her at the table, and then we hear my grandpa from the living room: “TAK, Son OF A GUN!!” I carefully “go see what is happening,”  though I already knew exactly what happened. My grandpa is looking at the doll with the missing finger. He gets super close till he is cross-eyed, then takes off his glasses, spits on them and wipes them, puts them back on, and looks again, in disbelief. Then he runs to my grandma:  “Son of a gun Ameli! I just bought this doll from Czech Republic, they makin everything so cheapy!”

Years later my brother finds a little white finger and sticks in another doll’s mouth -_-

 

 

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