Laughing For Abs

Laughing For Abs (LFA.. the new LOL)

When life gives you lemons, or a whole field of lemons for that matter, you juice those things and make  lemonade, sell them things in bags on the corner, make lemon bars. If no one is thirsty or hungry, give them away as additional beautification for fruit headdresses! 

Laugh for the Hour

“Did you know the new guy’s name is Bill?!? Can you believe it, his Mom named him after her mouth, she was a duck, married to a Pterodactyl..”

“Uhhh, Beaky don’t look now, but Bill is lookin’our way at 50 miles of mad..”

“Ok.. he’s real mad, 50 just became 150 miles of mad..”

“What is that in the sky, is that his dad?”

“Whatever it is..We don’t wanna be gulls right now…Do the flamingo!”


📎 Modern Day Noah’s Ark with the husband:

Cashier: “Would you like any sauce?”

Him: “Yes, two of each kind.”

Two of each Kind?!



Cali the Cat: “So you said you’d double dog dare to repeat that ‘ Dogs are so much better than cats?!’ The Alice Dog: “I’ll say it 500 hundred times, what you gonna do, bite my butt?”

Cali the Cat: *Sinks TeeTh Into German take-out*
The Alice Dog: TOOT!

Cali the Cat: PLAAA YUCK!!! How can your gas be so beefy?!?


  • “Well dog, you just blew me away. I never thought I’d live to say that…”

    📎Is it possible that jamming your toe and toe jam are related? Let’s toast to that conversation.


📎Gave someone the Thumbs Up👍 when they honked at me last week for stopping at a stop sign too long. Had to give my little son a toy to stop the pain of his HIAWATHA calls. Those people were waiting for the bird, it threw them off so much they looked at me as if  me AND my car needed a ride to a different city.


📎While scrolling through the gigs page on Craigslist:

‘I need help with wasp.’

🐸 k


The exuberant Postmates guy: “Delivery for Ping Win!”

Receptionist: “Ping Win, Ping Win, Ping Win… hmm, you said who?”

The exuberant Postmates guy: “Ya Ping Win, that’s his name Ping Win…”

Receptionist: “You have the wrong location, I think.”


Picture copyrighted to

“Where is my 🍣 Sushi!” “They said Postmates was in our town already!”


From the corner of my eye I watched as they conspired a plan together, one dressed in black, the other wearing a striped fur coat…

“Hey it’s rump roast tonight, kiss me and I’ll do the puppy eye thing, and by tonight we’ll be living large.”

“You better know what you’re doing, or I will rat you out for eating my poop last week!”